Originally written in October 3th, 2008

I wish…
On that day,
September 2th, 2008, if I had not agreed to come to the concert,
September 5th, 208, if Mr. Metcalfe had not accepted my request letter,
September 5th, 2008, if I had just gone to TIM to watch RENT presented by 42th Street Avenue
September 7th, if I had not said that “please tell me”,
September 8th, if I had not texted “the charm really works”,
September 9th, if I had not been online my YM and my roommate had not said “I have a song for you… It’s Jason Mraz”
September 10th, if I really had minded that I could be in his mind,
September 14th, if I had not asked to go to that deserted beach,
September 15th, if I had not gone to that deserted beach
…it would not have happened at all.

But hey,
Thank you, for making me realize that…
There was no sweet man
There was no unconditional love in such fairytales
There was no true care
There was no true promise and vow
There was no true love-saying
There was no love-will-last if the guy had loved you even for 5 months
There was no such song, “True to your heart”

That you used to sing at your awesome concert.

Great.
For having me and enjoying our 5-day dating relationship, after 5 months so long you waited for. And through many things also.

And.. Congratulation.
That finally, your curiosity towards me has fulfilled.
on that day, that maybe you actually waited for too,
15th of September,
You dumped me without consoling me. Was that you call as love? That was just a moment infatuation.
Thanks to my bestfriend Jessie, for introducing me that the word Infatuation does exist.

And I experienced that.

October 12, 2008: But if I keep saying “I wish I..” that means I haven’t forgiven myself. Coz forgiveness is something about forgiving yourself to GET WELL and MOVE ON.

Plugs: Cindy • RneeKrisnamurthi •

dear diary,

someone please take my feet down to earth, cause i have been flying nowhere so high with no direction. i have been in a rollercoaster of life. ups and downs. couldnt imagine that this actually happens.

and yes,
we mostly see the unexpected than the expected.

stop imagining, and go with your life.
time to move on.
yeah.

Plugs: Aya • RneeKrisnamurthi •

Geez,

I did stupid things. I broke up my boyfriend last saturday and I regretted it so much..

Argh,

The most beautiful thing in this life is to love someone, even the one that you love doesnt love you back..

I have a poem.. it’s written in Indonesia.. It’s nice..

permen rasa rasa manis
manis rasa rasa permen
melingkar-lingkar ku berlari
di warnamu putih ini
temui titik yang termanis

permenku
kuterjatuh di lingkaranmu krn kelalaianku
kubangkit lagi, kubertahan lagi. lagi
tetapi kutetap jatuh
jatuh jauh dari lingkarmu
memisahkan lingkar merahku dari lingkar putihmu

rasa sakit sakit kurasa
rasa sakit sakit kita rasa
mengiris kelamnya
merahku jadi gelap
putihmu jadi gelap

tanganmu tak terulur untukku
kugagal menggapai hatimu

maafkan aku merahku
kuteriak dan kumenangis
tiap malam
masih adakah harapan yang tersisa

manis rasa rasa harapan
menikmati bersama rasa baru
menyatukan kembali merah putih itu

Plugs: Jenn • Cindy •

Have you read this before? It’s so nice and sweet, I found it somewhere in my harddisk .. enjoy!

——

Message: This is a love letter from a boy to a girl….

However,the girl’s father does not like him and

want them to stop the relationship……

So, the boy wrote this letter to the little girl.

1 “The great love that I have for you

2 is gone, and I find my dislike for you

3 grows every day. When I see you,

4 I do not even like your face;

5 the one thing that I want to do is to

6 look at other girls. I never wanted to

7 marry you. Our last conversation

8 was very boring and has not

9 made me look forward to seeing you again.

10 You think only of yourself

11 If we were married, I know that I would find

12 life very difficult, and I would have no

13 pleasure in living with you. I have a heart

14 to give, but it is not something that

15 I want to give to you. No one is more

16 foolish and selfish than you, and you are not

17 able to care for me and help

18 I sincerely want you to understand that

19 I speak the truth. You will do me a favor

20 if you think this the end. Do not try

21 to answer this. Your letters are full of

22 things that do not interest me. You have no

23 true love for me. Good-bye! Believe me,

24 I do not care for you. Please do not think that

25 I am still your boyfriend.”

So bad….. However, the boy told the girl

before to

“READ BETWEEN THE LINES”, meaning only to

read 1.3.5.7.9.11.13……

So…

Please read it again!….it’s nice n sweet..

Plugs: abby •

June 27th, 2008. Friday.

I’m waiting.

Ring ring
It’s you again
Heart pops
I love to hear you
It’s been all day since I’ve been waiting for you
..
Loving you is hurt sometimes
I’m standing here you just don’t by
I’m always there you just don’t feel or
You just don’t wanna feel.
Don’t wanna be hurt that way
Doesn’t mean I’m giving up
I wanna give you more, and more, and more….

9 days passed. I only felt my happiest time with him yesterday night. And the other days? Oh, not really…
…continue reading the entry
called Night Cries

Plugs: